"You Are Not Here to Conform" - Why I Started This Blog

October 11th, 2022 By Peter Bialkowski

Here's the story of how PeterJohnSays came to be.

Photo credit: Matt Cubillos

By Peter Bialkowski

"You Don't Have to Be Like Anybody Else"

Hi. If you don't know me, my name is Peter. I'm a writer, singer, frequent SPF user, and most recently, blogger - right outside New York City! I write for a lifestyle magazine, make music videos, and share my love for skincare online.

Almost six months ago, I graduated college with nearly a 4.0 GPA (I got an A- in Theories of Mass Comm 🫠). I had an amazing internship that turned into a part-time job, was VP of a competitive a cappella group, and got multiple academic awards. On paper, I had the perfect college experience. So, what did I do after graduation? I took a break. After moving back to New Jersey after a failed attempt of living in Florida freshman year, being sent home halfway through sophomore year due to the pandemic, living at home junior year, and finally having a semi-normal senior year of college (besides wearing masks and still getting Covid during finals week), I decided I deserved to have a fun summer. I hopped on a plane the day after graduation, spent time with friends and family, wrote for the magazine, and focused on my music. It was great - until August.

Picture this: I'm in bed scrolling on Instagram. I start seeing pictures of my friends at their full time jobs. I get annoyed, so I switch to Snapchat. Same thing. I switch to TikTok. Seriously? There they all are. In new cities. Being adults. Living. I start to think, "Oh. Should I be job searching? I wanted to wait until the fall. Maybe I should have taken this more seriously." My stomach begins to churn. My mind begins to think.

What do I want to do? Do I want to live on the East Coast? The West Coast? Do I want to go to Grad school? Do I want to give up the singing dream? The writing dream? Which way is up? What do I do?

Now this is where the devil called comparison comes in. Sure, I didn't need to be comparing myself to other people, but it did wake me up.

For context, I graduated with a General Media degree. I didn't necessarily need a writing job. I had just let go of an opportunity to move to Los Angeles to study music at a private school that would put me in three times the amount debt I already have. To tell you the truth, I just wanted an office job that would pay for my music lessons. So I started applying for jobs. But I didn't do it the right away. Basically, I copied and pasted my bland resume and cover letter for every job that had the words "communications," "writing," or "public relations," in the title. I had a couple interviews, but nothing gave me that "this is it," feeling I always followed. So, I got a part-time job at Trader Joe's while I searched.

Then, I had the "perfect" opportunity ripped away from me at the eleventh hour in September. I had an "in" at a top ten Public Relations agency in New York City. I was referred to the hiring team and had the best interview I've ever had. In other words, I was told I had the job. But that's a story for another time. When that fell through, I was more upset than ever. Here I am, four months after graduation, lifting boxes and cleaning toilets at a grocery store, while my friends are making adult salaries and living in new places. I felt like a failure. Sure, I wrote for the magazine, but that wasn't substantial or financially dependable.

Little did I know, that failure would help me come to a really important realization - I wanted to move to New York City. I had gotten so attached to the idea of going into the city three times a week with my fancy clothes and networking with corporate professionals. But I wasn't necessarily excited about the Public Relations side of things. Sure, I didn't mind it. But was I passionate about it? No, I wasn't. I'm not.

So, I made a plan. I was going to give myself permission to let go and start working towards my dream to live in the city doing what I wanted to do; write. sing. live. Why couldn't I get the dream job? Why did I have to settle just because I knew somebody? It was that moment I decided I was only going to apply for Editorial Positions in NYC. And that brings us to present day.

I apply for jobs every day. I work two part-time jobs to save money. I re-formatted my resume and cover letter (go check them out, they're aesthetic), and I watch videos to help me cope with the fact that I'm not alone.

How did the blog start? Well, the idea really came from my mom. She told me my older sister had a website with all of her work on it, which her future employer would later read. She didn't even have an interview. Now, she works an amazing job as a Brand Strategist.

So, here I am. This blog is (hopefully) going to help me achieve one of my dreams; to work in beauty, music, and writing all-in-one. Not only will my work from the magazine be posted, but I'll also share stories from my life, music, and things I've learned as a 22-year old kid trying to navigate the adult world.

I hope you enjoyed my story and learned a little more about me. I'm taking a chance. Here's to finding that dream job, learning from mistakes, and living for you.

"You don't always have to be on top. Better to be hated than loved, loved, loved for what you're not." - Marina Diamandis